Before you do anything, go back to your textbook. Look at the sample lit analyses your author gives you. They are not awesome, but they are better in analysis and evidence than what many of you have written. Also look at the two I wrote for
A Tidewater Morning. Neither is finished BUT you will see that I have well-developed paragraphs focused on analysis and backed up with plenty of textual evidence. Were they finished, they would be longer than five paragraphs.
3rd hour Tidewater Morning essay
7th hour Tidewater Morning essay
When you rewrite, consider these most common problems:
Structure: You need a 2-part thesis. You must state theme in your thesis. Not a motif or topic, not a vague statement about what the author is doing. Clearly go out on a limb and state what you think the author's point is. Also make sure you've identified which element of the book you plan to analyze in order to prove that theme. This should all happen in ONE clear sentence that appears at then end of your introduction. Each body paragraph, then, should begin with a topic sentence that clearly supports that thesis AND is focused on the point the author is making with some aspect of that element.
Development: This should NOT be a 5-paragraph essay. You should have well-developed paragraphs (half to three-quarters of a page) and more than 5 of them. Five paragraphs should be too restrictive. You're arguing the point of a novel and you're not doing it in only 40 minutes. You've spent time reading, taking notes, studying this novel. Your analysis should reflect that in both depth and development of your ideas and argumentation. Your intro and conclusion should also be well-developed. All paragraphs (including your intro and conclusion) should be roughly the same size. If they are not, you need to split very long paragraphs into two or further develop the short ones.
Evidence: Almost all of you need WAY MORE. Literally, you need evidence for every single claim you make BUT you also need to introduce that evidence and EXPLAIN it! The best evidence is the author's own words. You are arguing that your interpretation of the novel is correct. Therefore, you can't rely on your interpretation of the author's words (what you're doing with paraphrasing) to be the only--or even majority--evidence. It's not believable. There are times when it's not efficient to show aspects of the book and you have to "talk about it"; however, that should not be the main way you support your claims.
The Quotes You Use and How You Include Them: Obviously, use MLA. And if you're doing anything weird, look up how to do it on Purdue OWL. Long quotes have different rules. Quoting multiple paragraphs (as in dialogue or a play) has different rules. Quoting poetry has different rules (including Shakespeare). Also, do NOT use ellipses. If you're not going to use the whole passage, then do multiple short quotes that point out the parts you want--don't simply skip over the stuff you don't want. It makes your reader question what you're leaving out. Probably you're doing it for space sake--to make your paper more concise. But it opens up your ethos to questions. Also, multiple short quotes is ALWAYS preferable to long quotes. Only use long quotes when you absolutely must. I'm pretty positive that I have not shown you a single example of lit analysis that uses long quotes. They are simply not efficiently effective--and that's what you need.
Use Your Own Analysis: Don't be looking to outside resources to help you figure out your book. We have come a long way in your critical reading skills and this is where you use them. You're all smarter than Sparknotes or Novelguide or any other website for stupid people who don't read their assigned novels. Those cheater sites are NOT analyzing the novel at the level I am expecting you to. Therefore, don't look to them for answers to what you should think or see in your novel. Daisy represents the upperclass? Duh. Why would you need a site to tell you that? The green light represents Daisy? Welcome to Gatsby 101. You don't need those sites and they will NOT help you get a good grade. You have to be able to explain and support your interpretation. Those sites will not do that for you so you might as well spend your time interpreting the book on your own and writing something interesting and fresh because it actually came from your head--which will make it far easier for you to explain and support!
If for no other reason, keep this in mind: This process is where you figure out how to write an analysis--how to take your critical reading skills, interpret a work, and explain and argue it for others. If you don't do that here and now while you have time to practice, work through it, and get feedback, how will you EVER be able to do in on the test in a timed situation? Don't take the "easy way out" and end up shooting yourself in the foot.
Polishing: Yeek!
I wrote a whole post on this and I feel like only 10-15% of you even looked at it! Don't EVER turn in something you haven't polished! Don't do it now in high school and definitely don't do it next year in college. It is the WORST thing for your ethos. It makes you look like either you don't know any better or you don't care about the quality of your work. Why would you spend hours on your content and then give your teacher/professor a horrible first impression??? You may not be any good at mechanics, but it is time to deal with that. Either figure out what you don't know and learn it (there is no grammar or mechanics rules you cannot teach yourself from free resources like Purdue) or learn who likes you enough and is good enough at this skill to read your papers and edit them for you. If no one that likes you enough is any good at this stuff either, be prepared to use other resources or pay for editors. In college that means going to the writing center for editing (which means getting your paper done early so you have time for that) or paying anywhere from $15-25/hour for editing. It's cheaper and easier to just learn yourself.
Do some major revision to your essays. Take the time to do a good job, clean up the problems, end up with a good paper that is all yours. I expect FAR better work. I expect it to take me a fraction of the time to grade because they are all good. If that puts pressure on you, then good. It should. You all are capable of far better than you handed in.
